My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

This is a must read: Deal or no deal

Sunday, I’m in the yard. Nothing makes me happier than power equipment. Mulching machine chomping up autumn leaves. My troubles are few when I’m yielding anything with 2 1/2 horsepower engine.

Coming back inside there’s a letter on my desk. It’s from my wife. It’s a draft contract. The two page document has nine (9) deal points. I start reading. Item #1 says I must take an active interest in the up bringing of my children. OK – thought I was doing that already. Item #2 says I will limit all extra marital activity to out of town events. Am I reading this correctly? It goes on. Item #7 says I will not put my friend’s needs ahead of my family.

I batphone Peter. He agrees this calls for an immediate BFF (best friends forever) conference. Off to the bat cave, I race to pick-up him up for brunch. He reeks of alcohol and other scents, that I’m trying not to place.

Ordering a dozen oysters and a Bloody Mary, he’s scanning the contract. “Holy bill of rights, Batman!”, Peter shouts. “This is serious news.” I, too, am struggling to understand. Peter is gleefully referring to Item #7 as the “Peter Law” because he believe it applies solely to him.

My wife has basically folded her cards, she’s negotiating with herself, never write a draft contract that isn’t to your advantage. I fear this is a desperate women in desperate times. She’s running out of options.

I haven’t formed an opinion yet. I’m thinking. She’s thinking.
What do you think?


  1. I think you have one of the most interesting and intriguing relationships I”ve ever read about. I wonder if your wife has a blog…”My life with my gay husband”

  2. Good lord! she is kinda giving you some sorta ultimatum.Sadly the contracts are coming out of the woodwork.
    Leading separate lives doesn’t have to necessarily make it hard for the kids,but of course, you know your situation more intimately than anyone else.
    Do what feels right.You’re a good guy, trying to make the east and the west meet, but sadly the twain never does meet.
    Keep paddling and smiling; I know you will 🙂

  3. in reading, i think its time to make a decision, it think you want to, but like me, afraid to take that step and live in total truth and honesty, i think we need to get off our asses and decide, and move on and see what life really has for us

  4. Sounds very continental to me. She’s making the best she can of the situation and giving you all the rope you need. You need to concentrate on moving on but at the same time not alinating what sounds like a pretty terrific wife.

  5. My impression from the outside? This woman is in agony and deperately trying to hold things together.
    Fortune Magazine, Nov 12, article on Dominic Orr, read it, anything look familiar?

  6. WOW! I’m just now catching up on your blog! It’s sad, but it does look like the beginning of the end really…she’s trying to hold things together but seriously, do you think you can live like this forever? Your wife is obviously a very generous person and concerned for the welfare of your children, which is very admirable, but is staying together and dragging this out the best option for either of you??? Big hug from Down Under!

  7. Sorry, i’m a little late commenting on this. As we speak i’m courting a female lawyer in los angeles. I’m sure chris would say that misrepresenting my true emotions but while that might be the case, it has nothing to do with this post. The current object of my affection is an attorney, whom i had review this “social contract”. Her comments, after she stopped laughing, was that this did not qualify as a contract because there are no penalties associated with any of these items. So we both say, this is not a contract, just a cry for help. I leave you with a final thought; Sometimes winning in a relationship, isn’t as much fun as winning on the baseball field or the boardroom.

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