My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

match.com ain’t matching my dot.com

Throwing caution to the wind in July, I joined match.com, wrote up a pithy story about me, offered to send anyone who wanted to know my faults William’s write-up on me. Hit the publish button and off I went.

I did a fair amount of searching, most folks had a nice & sincere profile, if someone was interesting, I sent a cute intro note. I sent notes of encouragement to a couple of guys who were well outside my shopping territory (stop the snickering), just to say hi. A whole bunch of people sent me emails and I made a point of responding to everyone. The "wink" people can just go screw themselves though. I managed to go out and actually meet in person a couple of people.

But I realized, it’s a fair bit of work without the resulting success. It’s really tough to make a chemistry call from reading someone’s profile. You can get a sense of them from their email tones. But in the end, it’s a face to face where the call is made about a person. Worse, in this anonymous electronic media, someone can simply disappear at any point, never to be seen again. I certainly did, couple of folks creeped me out in an email exchange. I just stopped answering.

I was guilty too of sometimes being slow to respond. Often days would lapse when someone sent me a message and I had time to answer.  Peter had also tried match.com and had similar results. So after a meaningful effort, I pulled my profile and will focus on other fronts. I suspect many people come and go from these services, when they’re busy they ignore it and only when they’re lonely do they jump back in.

1 Comment

  1. So what’s up with you and Connor. Seems he’s always doing “adorable” things. Is he not worth persuing?

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