My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

A nice dinner at home

I’m at home, or at least the only place I can call home. Home, where my wife and kids live, I don’t though. My wife has been quite nervous. She wants to adopt a more business like relationship. That’s fine, but something else is bothering her and after a little interrogation it come out, she’s worried I’m going to abscond with all of our finances and fritter it away on some brown boy, leaving her and the kids high and dry. It had better be a pretty damn good brown boy.

She certainly has cause for worry. People do stupid stuff and I’m not immune. I’ve certainly spent money on my Tiger Cub, but it’s only incidental monies. Men have used money to control their love ones for a long time. More likely, I might move all my accounts to some off shore bank as most of our accounts are just in my name. Nothing worse than feeling powerless.

I acknowledged this to be a valid concern and said I’d put some thought into how to address this for her. She was quite happy and I will indeed put some cycles into it. Screwing people over, especially family, isn’t a great long strategy.

After a fantastic dinner (I’m drinking up my good collection of wine), we sat and talked. I openly discussed Tiger Cub and that he would soon be leaving. But why, she asked, isn’t he good for you, aren’t you two good together? I tossed out the age difference, but she countered that it doesn’t really matter.

My friend Peter said relationships are either coming together or falling apart, they’re never static and the fact is TC and I are falling apart or perhaps just losing orbit. If you’re having to work at a relationship, then the relationship isn’t working.

I talked about our own marriage, we never had to work at it, like a synchronized swimming event, we happened together and never had to talk about love, commitment and trust. We just knew it was there. We were both satisfied.

Sadly, we know of too many married couples who are forever at odds, a train wreck waiting to happen. In the ensuing silence, we realized how lucky we were and that it was in our own best interests to figure how to maintain some elements of our relationship. So I’ll just bask in this warmth for a while longer.

3 Comments

  1. Chris,
    I’m glad you were able to have that talk about money, never an easy one.
    Whatever else you are you are not a monster. Take very good care of your family but also take very good care of yourself.
    What ever is out there for you, you will find.
    All the best,
    Mark

  2. Ahh, shucks. I was hoping you would get back together with your wife and live happily ever after…

  3. shame. sounds like you and your wife have it all…including deep love for each other..you may never find that on the other side:(

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