A nice lady in UK left this comment to my “No picture can tell a story” posting and wanted to call your attention to it. Not sure any women are reading this blog and she surely is the first with the energy to post a comment. It’s clearly a different prospective.
“I thought you might find it interesting to hear from a woman who was in the situation your wife is in now. Married with kids, the man I married decided after ten years to go live a gay life instead. We were best friends and lovers and trying for another baby.. It’s interesting to read your comments because nearly everything you say is totally centred around you – even ‘your’ worry for your wife.
At some stage, probably gradually, your wife will leave you – physically, spiritually, perhaps financially and definitely emotionally. You may not read the signs but they are there. Gay ex-husbands like to say to themselves that they and their wives will eventually be friends – and go to great lengths to convince themselves and others of this. There may be some kind of communication but the kind of intimacy you once had can never be retained, once trust is broken or a partner betrayed. It doesn’t matter if you break that trust by sleeping with a man or a woman. That bit in a sense is immaterial!
I hope your wife does manage to move on, to create a new life for herself and, eventually if she wants to, find a new partner to trust and to love and who will in turn trust and love her. Her anger and grief will probably be necessary fuel for that journey. And if you have ever had any feelings of genuine love for her, you must let her go. Completely. No strings attached. It’s the very least you can do…. Let your wife read this and know that I wish her well.”
Note: I take orders well, so I dutifully printed out her comment and gave it to my wife. The result, like asking a women for directions, you know you’re not going to get anywhere, but you have to be polite and listen.