My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Update for those that care

updateappiphoneI haven’t posted in a while because well, the story has been told. So if you’re new reader, go ahead start back from the beginning, looking at the logs it would seem several times a week some newbie hits this site and 900 clicks later they’ve read the whole story. It’s you, the few readers why I don’t just shutter the blog (as seems to be the trend). You can’t benefit from my experiences if you can’t read about them.

As an update, Scrappy and I are still living together. 6+ years together and a 23 year age difference. He barks. I growl. But we live pretty much like any other married couple does. He talks to my wife and kids regularly and on all these fronts, life is well. Could it be better? Yeah sure. But it could also be worse.

Scrappy gets off his leash periodically and has his nights out, he’s not yet 30 and frankly I’m too old to hang with his younger group of friends. Trying to enjoy a quiet evening of my stuff, he then commences to call ever 25 minutes to ask what I’m doing and gets upset when I get annoyed. Truth be know, he misses me. It’s funny and sweet all at the same time.

He romped home early one night after meeting up with a 36 year old London friend in town and lamented how this guy couldn’t find a boyfriend, talking about his last long term relationship of 3 months and how his dating pattern is something on the order of 3 weeks. Having had the opportunity to catch up on several of my old blogs I used to read, I realized this pattern as well.

I’ve written before but will be more direct. Considering how few homos there are, you’d think the group would be a bit more lenient on each other. I’ve found this species highly insecure, over sexed and due to the general discrimination faced usually show up at your door with all sorts of emotional baggage in tow. On this, you’re supposed to build a solid relationship?

Yeah straight people have issues too, but the layers of short and badly ended relationships stack up after a while against the homos. What I’m saying – it’s hard and this isn’t just a casual observation by me, just read the other blogs.

As a newbie, I tried to change the rules of play and lucky for me, I accidentally got Scrappy, otherwise I’d likely be playing suck-a-cock roulette like so many other gays with a revolving door of relationships. It truly can be that awful for some.

My friend, Prof Tim, recognizing this pattern, has found himself in some odd ball quasi-relationship with this younger guy. Tim plays the senior guy, the younger more submissive. They do everything together and by all appearances act like a couple. Maybe there is love, but there is no sex or physical interaction. Each profess themselves open to dating others, but they really don’t. Odds as it may be, if it works for them so thus who am I to complain.

As Tim is nearing 40, he told me he really needed to get a new relationship because “I’ve only got a 2 or 3 good years left.” With that statement, he confirmed that homos pretty much are retired at 30 and just about dead at 40. I, it would seem, have already turned to dust. You laugh, but it’s so true. But I watch 40 year old straight guys still trying to snag the 20 something set.

My advice (sprinkled in other posts) generically is set your rules, make sure they’re only guidelines though and be open. If you find someone interesting, play it like a fish, take your time, make each other work and keep your dick out of the conversation for as long as physically possible (and I’m not talking hours). If you do manage to land someone, navigate as fast as possible away from the caustic pool of other homos (visit only as necessary to remind you that it’s not so green there). Close your eyes and ears often and pray when all else fails.





  1. It’s been awhile my friend but your blog is pithy as always.

  2. Hey… It’s been a long time since you last updated!!! 😀 with so many things I couldnt end to read all your blogs but knowing that u and scrappy are still together is a great thing. All my best wishes to u!! Fran from Nicaragua! 😀

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