Time for a funny. My 17 yo son and are out driving about and TC calls. I’m talking and clearly my son is listening to my half of the conversation. TC is up in a tree about something and I’m using my “Yes, dear”, “No, dear”, “Sparkling with a slice of lemon, dear” tone to try and talk him back down. I look over and my son is about to burst out laughing. I grin. TC in mini-Diva mode is hard to take too seriously. I’ve started to refer to him now as Tiger Puff.
Tiger Puff with his ESP capabilities suddenly stops talking. “Is your son in the car with you?”, he asks. Yes, I reply. His microprocessor quickly churns 8 billion calculations and realizes how silly all of this must sound to another person. “Chris how embarrassing, you didn’t tell me he was with you, OMG, what was I talking about, how could you do this …. “. And back up into the tree he went. 🙂
Single Guy in the City (he’s so cute) is admonishing me about my careless food habits and that I’m clearly not the typical gay guy. I’m just a guy, no gym rat. But you know the type. I spot’d two Puffs at the airport today. A little couple, queer as they could be. Hell I’m getting good at calling whose the bottom in the relationship. So no I don’t fit that mold. But many guys also don’t fit the stereotypical role, unfortunately you might not find them either at a local gay club or bar. They’re more likely to be online or Craigslist.
Obviously, the more “out” they are, the more out they are. My wife and I had laughed about her work colleague who has out’d himself to a ‘select’ few as “no one knows”. Come on, mid 40’s, not married, not dating a woman, the bigger question is who doesn’t know. He’s a big old queen himself. It’s that perception versus reality game that we often play with ourselves. One of my Latin gay friends has professed for all to know that he’s “in a relationship” (with a girl). Butit’s a scam to put his family at ease. He doesn’t come off as a gay guy but family pressures “are you dating someone” gets old..
You do what you do and you need be the only judge. However, I worry about the long time emotional impact when you constantly are battling, real or imagined, to portray a different image.