My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Time is ticking

Where am I? Where else, sitting at an airport waiting to leave. I’m in Prague. The long weekend over. I’m eyeing this adorable Canadian who checked in with 2 of his friends. I think I like Canadians. Part of my international diplomacy effort.

The weekend with TC has been bittersweet. His return to Canada is booked for June 13th.  I’m an emotional wreck. I had to have a drama moment and two nights ago, I did. Told TC our relationship was at end. He would simply go home to Canada and that would be it. Thus we were both wasting time just hanging out. I’m looking for a longer term relationship. Best to end it, years from now, we could look at the photos we’ve taken of our adventures and remember each other sweetly, a chapter in our lives.

TC sat silently, his big brown almond eyes welled with tears. I asked if he saw any other possibility? He remained silent.

We walked back to the hotel after dinner, I kept talking, when I digging a hole, I don’t stop until I’ve reached the bottom.  At the hotel, Chris perches in the window sill, he stares out upon the illuminated cityscape. I’m confused. I decide it’s time to be the women that I am and predictably fall apart, sobbing like a baby on his shoulder. His tiny body tries to consol the hulk of my 6’2” frame. I’m sad and confused. He’s not far behind.

Good relationships with another person are rare and my own personal observations are that gay relationships have their added challenges. So here I sit with TC, at 23 he’s got some growing up to do, half the time I just wanna kill him. But I can’t escape the warmth that we have for each other. But long distance love, just doesn’t work, it’s not fair.

I’ve no idea what’s going to happen. But June 13th is a hard stop and I’m hardly waiting. TC is still in Prague for another day, why do I feel like these chapters aren't yet over.

2 Comments

  1. It’s gotta be hard! I’ve had “holiday romances” where there was a guaranteed end date and they were hard enough to get over…and they only lasted a few weeks max! So, having been with TC for as long as you have, AND now having an end date, it’s gotta be killing you! Big hug!

  2. It appears to me that you don’t really want this romance to end…..oh you are saying all the right things….pushing them along…..but I think you really want TC to say enough…..”it’s not over it’s only just beginning”. If that’s what you really want will then say it damn it. Enough with the subtle hints.

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