My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Phase 2

I’m busy, you’re busy, we’re all busy. I’m trying not to think that in just over 2 weeks, TC will be back in Toronto and I will be sad.

One of the issues I’ve waffled on is my interest in the gay community.  Frankly, I’m not. I tried really hard, but hanging around with a bunch of bitchy, catty guys for the sole purpose of being ‘gay-ee’ just isn’t all that interesting to me. TC is more comfortable but he’s equally comfortable the two of us hanging out, which is what we do.

I guess I’ve entered Phase 2 or perhaps 3 of whatever this is going to be, mainly just getting on with my life. Yes, if TC rolls my cage close to anything I find interesting, I might swap my paw around in the air, but sadly, he doesn’t move my cage much. 🙁

I admitted to TC that I found myself bored with our relationship sometimes, we have developed a number of routines. You know the drill,  not terribly exciting, but comfortable. But with intermissions of self-created drama, the classic one of us gets pissed off at the other, argument ensues that is usually way out of proportion, door slams, everyone cools off, make up time. Plain silly stuff, I will sneak up on him at night and scare the crap out of him. In the end, we awaken together happy and that’s the way it should be.

I fear I’m entering a phase where we both need to or should be working on ways to ‘keep it interesting’ . His pending self-imposed exile to Toronto creates the ‘missing you’ element which always works. You realize what you have only when it’s one. It’s trying to keep the bubble in the middle which I fear may be the most difficult.


  1. Incredibly self-revealing -thanks for sharing I’m sure you are not alone in trying to keep the relationship fresh between the bookends of drama. And I’m pretty sure the gay community may not have answers for that, so it looks like you are on your own. Unless you can enlist the help of some true friends (see your earlier posting) Good luck!

  2. I don’t think it’s exclusive to the gay community. Only in the straight world couples have children usually to fill up the “empty” space and keep them busy.

    If you find the answer please tell me.

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