My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Ooops, did I do it again?

So far, if you’re counting – check me, I’ve told 5 people about my "situation". The situation being, ever so slightly modified my sexual orientation, ran away from home, to another country, and now lived shacked up with 23 yo brown boy. Did I miss anything?

OK time to add a 6th person to the mix. So I have a long time friend, Adam, who lives in Germany, haven’t seen him in years, but rang him and had lunch about 3 months ago. All business. He’s my age. A New York Jew in Germany for 15 years. He’s not married and always had casual relationships with women, no kids, but living with a girl at the moment. Very alternative type of guy.

Well, fast forward and in February, email he’s coming to London. "Let’s get together Tuesday evening, why are you spending so much time away from your family?", Adam asks.

Well my short response to his email is pretty much the first paragraph of this blog entry. He’s in advertising and I figured a pithy "you get everything" one-liner would amuse him to know it.

But guess what? He hasn’t called or responded since. Worse, two days after I sent the email and I wrote again saying — "what’s up, we getting together?". Still nada.

Now Adam may well be busy, but the four folks I’ve told all dropped whatever to have our conversation. It’s interesting and serious, but none have reacted negatively. So Adam’s reaction kinda of surprises me.

I suspect that everyone is going to react differently, some not like you’d expect. Do you simply stop telling people?


  1. When you come out, you may loose some friends..but if they cannot accept the real you then they are not true friends. I’ve only had one or two negative experiences.

  2. Chris,
    This is yourjourneyout. If you don’t hear from Adam again than you know his response…..and move on…..

  3. chris how you doin buddy…so far people i have told none have been surprized…hmmmm…and none have reacted negativly…so if they do, the’re not worth having as a friend and should not be classed as a true friend

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