My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

No, the weather didn’t look like the picture

London SOHO district – I hate going out by myself. Who does right?  But it’s Saturday night and I’m a short walk to gay central for London. I’m organizing my plan of attack, 1 drink in every bar. My plan get quickly shot to hell.

I’m in Ku-Bar, a 3 story busy bar, but the vibe isn’t right, I smell  attitude. Then I wander over to G.A.Y., Monty had given me fatherly advice about this place, and just like a rebellious teenager, I’m going. A mix of people, women and men. The Brits are just a tad standoffish, I’m throughly amused as I get snubbed in my attempts to say hello. Thankfully, a nice ratio of brown. I spy a stylish dressed smallish long haired brown guy with sparkling eyes and tight body. Radar contact. Oswaldo is from Brazil and is “waiting for friends” (who never seem to appear), we start chatting away, a fashion designer. I’m not his type, he likes the tall pasty Brit look, but we decide to hang out.

I don’t meet any white folks that night, but a bunch from Spain, Brazil and South Africa (he was a Italian/Chinese mix). This cute well dressed Middle East mid-20’s followed me around the whole night (and to the next place as well), but I guess it’s a culture thing, he keep looking at me but didn’t engage when I reached out. On the reverse, a barely dressed Libyan chatted for a while. Something in the brown culture they aren’t afraid to show their passion, I love that, you know where you stand with them. Oswaldo, despite 5 years in London, makes direct eye contact and talks to anyone he’s interested in. He gets tossed back a bunch by the Brits. The art of flirting, it doesn’t have to go anywhere, but makes for a nice evening. The only thing you need to be scared of is yourself.

Finally stop, Astoria, a huge dance club, mixed gay/straight, loud, flashing lights, the whole scene. I’m tired and NO I’m not in pick-up mode. I collect a bunch of telephone numbers, Oswaldo kisses me good bye and at 3 a.m. I walk back to the hotel. Oswaldo sends me a sweet text and wants us to go out on my next trip.

AREN’T you guys proud of me, I’m such an angel!!!!


  1. It’s great that you are brave to talk to strangers. I’m terrified to go to a gay bar by myself!

  2. Oops! Looks like what I am looking for and what you are looking for are two VERY different things! I found NOTHING in G A Y however looks like you found quite a few! 🙂

  3. Nice work;) Hope you post about that upcoming meeting.

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