When you’re younger, relationships all start out innocent, the casual encounter, let’s have drinks, the random shag, all good stuff. If you’re, in the midst of this casual encounter, some smart girl pushes a ring thru your nose and leads you down the altar before you realize the party was actually to the right and bang your married. The gay world works the same way, only there’s no girl and no ring thru your nose.
Sometime after 30 or your 10,000th sex partner, it suddenly dawns on you that the scene on this merry-go-round doesn’t seem to be changing and decide it’s time to get all serious. A real relationship, something to settle your seas. So you start real dating. No more casual patio drinks, you come armed with a series of interview questions based upon what you’ve learned, what you want and what you need. You’re in control. Unfortunately the other person has equal control. Thus a nice round of drinks becomes some tiring list of ping pong Q&A, all designed to see if you could trip up the other person. There’s no casual sex (unless your SIC). This is war.
A couple of ‘dates’ like that, you come home more exhausted than when you left and you’re out of the dating scene and back on the merry-go-round (at least you know what it looks like). So much for that. Guys simply resign to hang out with their friends or girlfriends with the occasional shag thrown for for medicinal purposes. Relationships all start innocently, a little spark, a little tug, if you have to talk about it deepening, it isn’t.
I hold on to TC because I know our relationship is not easily replicated. It’s a little crazy, but crazy compared to what. It started innocently and casually and it was indeed me with the nose ring, he hardly realized I’d snared him until it was too late.