My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Madrid

Barely 24 hours in Madrid, I’m sitting at my favorite tapas place in the gayborhood. Drinking a red wine, munching away on a tapas. I left the office at 7.30 and felt I’d put a good day in, despite the jet lag, I was functioning. Now I’m functioning again. OMG – this place is crawling with Asians, all speaking with a Spanish accent. I check my pulse, I may have died and gone to heaven.

I’m watching a couple, old guy with a young Asian. Is this how TC and I look together? Disgusting. In fact, homos together are fairly revolting at some deep level for me. It’s just wrong. Some caveman instinct kicks in on me, I try and apply some higher order thinking. Slowly I do become more comfortable.

I wander back to the hotel. Everyone is thin here, no fat Americans. I wander with ease. Meandering with no purpose, it’s the European way, the ability to derive pleasure from doing virtually nothing. ┬áIt’s a struggle for most Americans to grasp. There must be a sale going on somewhere. Not necessarily universally loved, but not hated as well.

Gay bars, bear clubs and unspoken places hidden behind imposing metal doors line my way home. With a new smoking ordinance, the streets are lined with those seeking a ‘puff’, mainly older guys.

But I go home. I am married, twice over. The Siberian Tiger is likely pacing his cage. He will be enroute soon enough. Not matter how much I think I might enjoy this wee bit of freedom, the reality, I like having my regular rules, a warm cage each night and saucer of milk before bed. I continue to defy the odds.

2 Comments

  1. Yes. You and TC look odd..old guy with young Asian guy. But it’s ok…that’s normal. Have some Sangria for me!

  2. Viva La Espana…….odd, hardly…..we’re all odd and unique is good. You don’t have to have anyone’s approval for being you.

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