My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Look it’s a plane

Arggh. It’s snowing and supposed to get worse. I’ve been working from home today and may not be able to leave. Lovely.

But it’s sunny and almost warm in London. TC giving me a Skype video tour. You can see the London Eye in this photo. He’s not a happy pup. Call me surprised but he postponed the start of his training (originally scheduled for the 15th). Why did he do this? He professes he needs to think some more.

The reality, though, is he wants something to happen that won’t leave him with a decision to make. The cruise company could get sick of his crap and just say “no, thanks for playing”. I could go “off reservation” and whore it up and hurt his tender young feelings and his direction would be clear. But I ain’t gonna make it that easy.

I guess that’s why that say something is a  “hard” decision, because it’s hard. It’s not patently obvious what needs to be done and worse, the consequences of the loser in the decision are also quite difficult. We don’t often get faced with “hard” decisions but we all have our own method for dealing with them. TC’s mode is simply never to have to face one down.

You could say it’s a question of maturity, and you’d be right. But all of us hate to face these things and just as often we postpone what we know is the inevitable. The courage to make the call comes from within and no friend, advisor or loved one can tell or steer you on what to do.

I may and I use the word MAY as tentatively as I can have to go to Paris next week for a quickie. TC immediately was prancing around the room just plain gidy. I’m happy when he’s happy. But it’s just tenative, I haven’t been to Europe in a while. Paris in February. Great.

1 Comment

  1. I hope you will not close your blog ever. Loved reading your journals. Just finished reading the PDF file and thoroughly enjoyed it.

    Please keep your blog for us gay guys who are still “searching” our way through the maze. Coming from a Third World country where being gay is totally frowned upon, your journal does provide us a glimmer of hope.

    In case no one has told you, Dad/Son relationships here are treated as an affront to civility and an insult to decency. I personally think that hell will have frozen before the Catholic Church will even recognize that two men can deeply fall in love with one another.

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