My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Let’s continue talking about sex

Yes I’m still horny and one more comment about blow-up dolls and I’m gonna have to ban a reader. I was wondering, do those blow-up guys come in different colors, I’ve only seen the white ones. I mean, not for a serious relationship, something in a light tan, you know, just some weekend fun, NSA type of stuff. There are many positive points, oh never mind.

In the course of the last couple of weeks, I’ve heard two strikingly similar stories from two guys, one gay the other not. Seems these two guys have developed relationships with another guy and girl (respectfully). They geniunely like the other person, have a great time together, just fun to be with. The one downer, neither of my friends are particularly enjoying the sexual side of their new found loves. In fact, they both kinda of don’t look forward to having sex with them.

Now you’d say fine. sex is important, if it’s not working out, just move on. But no, that would be too easy. So both of my friends have been screwing around with other girls/boys and obviously not telling the “other” person. The excuses and reasons start to fly when I ask both my friends the simple question “Why? Why are you doing this?”. The best they can muster is “we’re not in a committment relationship”. Well how would the other person feel if they found out. Universally, the answer is “they’d feel bad and I’d feel worse”. So why do it?

I’m not slamming either of my friends, relationships are like playing poker, never sure what or when to discard, simply trying to play the hand you’ve been deal and hope for better cards next round. You tend to hold on to what you’ve got, until you’ve got something better.

I talked to TC about this last evening. I was surprised when he said that he had offered me pretty poor sex in our first months together. “You couldn’t have been happy sexually with me”, he said. No I wasn’t. He was holding back. In re-reading my own blog entries, I was wondering why I had been sniffing around London alone, in bars, with young guys. Lucky for me, I didn’t stray horribly off course. But something was missing and that was unfulfilled sexual desire.

I managed to hold on and TC eventually turned up the burner. I’m a happy little camper and can’t wait until he uses the convection burner on me. But if he hadn’t, what then? Well likely instead of going to bed alone last night, I’d of found myself in the gayborhood of Cologne chattering away with some twinkie college student. Ah, the good old days.

1 Comment

  1. Hum……..I’ve been reading your blog from the beginning (will almost) and I don’t remember such “good ole days”.
    The good ole days began when a certain TC came into your life. Oh I agree that your blogs weren’t filled with amazing sex at the beginning. In fact they rarely are now, accept the tone of the blog allows us to know that “things” are very very different now.

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