My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

I’m always in trouble, no matter the sex

London, Friday night, TC is working at his SOHO bar. 4 stories of fun, the scene is metro sexual with both straight and gay groups intermingling. It’s Chris’s first night back on the job.

I’ve hit a couple of other SOHO attractions (I am a tourist after all) and just after 11 arrive at Chris’s bar. I order a drink from the main level bar, nod to Chris and wander off. I’m cool aren’t I? At one of the upstairs bars, I start chatting with one of the bartenders, telling him I know Chris downstairs. Cute. My type. Smallish, dark hair & complexion, he’s early 20’s from Uzbekistan. I’m not sure where that is exactly. From what I’m thinking, it doesn’t matter. Fully fueled with a couple of drinks, I lean in and tell him how terribly cute he is. He smiles.

The next morning, TC and I are talking in bed. He’s asking how I enjoyed his bar. I’m telling him about the bartender upstairs with whom I chatted. “Oh really, how surprising”, he replies. I continue to dig a hole going on about how cute he was. “Yes, I can see he is definitely your type”, Chris allowing me to commit suicide. I conclude with my telling the bartender how cute he was. “That’s very sweet”, he coyly responds.

Turns out the bartender had ratted me out to Chris that night. Men, you just can’t trust’em. Chris was holding this card to play at some point in the future on me. Unfortunately, I spoiled the deal by confessing. I always confess. Chris having a good laugh, he knows how I am. He gets a little jealous but that’s ok. I know how to deal with that behaviour. 🙂


  1. Chris: I don’t follow. You now say that Toronto Chris is playing hard to get, yet you earlied said that you two have never had sex (or did I misread that somewhere in your earlier blog entries?) If you are not having sex, what is he playing hard to get at? Hate to be blunt, but — he’s already played that card with you.

  2. I’m not so sure it’s about the sex Ernesto…’s more about the feeling of being comfortable with yourself. In that respect Chris and Chris (too many Chris’s) are well matched. Each with his own set of problems, but willing to be in a comfortable relationship, which continues to grow.
    What else can you ask for. Our Chris will never stop flirting…..he’s too good at it. I don’t really think Toronto Chris is threatened by this.

  3. Mark, please, you don’t have a clue. There is nothing “comfortable with yourself” about our two dear Chrises. One is an older man who views gay men as either being “so gay,” “so effeminate” “so swooshy” — clearly not comfortable with himself. The second Chris is a young man who has no career, who is not openly gay to his family, who has never (best I can tell) held down a job. These are not characters “comfortable” with themselves. They are vulnerable, they are somewhat amusing, they are not comfortable.

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