In June 2007 (wow I'm been writing for that long), I published a checklist of "things" I'd recommend YOU do, if you find yourself in a similar situation to me. That posting is now long buried and I've decided to post it again because I think it's a valuable one. So here's goes …

1. Get help – it's tough to figure this out alone, get a therapist, my biggest recommendation! If you get a bad one, get another one. Your friends can only carry you so far, you're gonna need a professional on this mission. Ask for medication early (can't hurt).

2. Be honest – I dribbled the truth out to my wife in the course of several weeks, bad idea, like ripping a band-aid off, you need to do it all at once, she's gonna have questions, lots of them, and you're going to have to answer them. So plan on telling everything, to the extent possible, all at once. It's painful, but better to have the pain in a single sitting.

3. Don't use the truth as a weapon – in answering questions try and refrain from phrases like, "God he was soo hot" or "I'd never seen a dick that big in my life". Answer your wife's questions honestly, but you don't need to give full color commentary. They're going to ask that sort of detail, they just don't really need or want to know despite what they think. Be honest, but to a point.

4. Be honest with yourself – this is a hard one and if you're semi-intelligent even worse, because you're going to try and rationalize all kinds of things about yourself. Listening to yourself is damn hard. Hold the mirror up and allow yourself time to see you.

5. Hope for the best, prepare for the worse – my wife was great, almost supportive. Yours may not be. In disclosing this, you may find your clothes in the street and her yielding a butcher knife as you run down the street with her lawyer ringing your cell phone to drain your bank account. Think about what she may do and have a plan and a back-up plan to that.

6. Allow yourself time – everything works out in the end, so allow yourself some time to figure things out, it's not all going to happen in a week. On the other hand, dwelling on this for years isn't productive either. Life is too short, everyone's book ends the same way, you're dead. So set a time schedule and get on with it.

7. Your friends are still there – the friends I told my story to were all very supportive. If you give them a chance, they'll rally around you, you're going to run into the wrong sorts along this rocky path so it's best to have a few familiar faces with you.

As I re-read this "checklist", I'm personally thinking about #6, recognizing it's now over 2 years ago, while I feel I'm made progress, it's still not enough. I gotta get Tiger Cub to DC and set-up shop and just get on with it. Wheels need to turn.