My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

Good daddy

It’s mid morning in Hong Kong and somewhere over the Arctic circle Scrappy is likely trying to make himself comfortable on what is one of the longest airplane rides in the world. In a few hours, he’ll unwind himself off the plane, emerge from baggage claim and start barking at me again.

He’s been gone for 6 weeks. A long time, but I’ve been on the road a bit and frankly I enjoy a little time by myself. If it’s any of your business, I’ve been a good boy. Mostly.

I was in Singapore back in June and we’d hosted a cocktail party on the roof of one of iconic hotels. Bunch of Asian business guys, boring as shit, until I spotted this young 28 yo journalist we’d invited. Done talking about work, I went over and start flirting with him (big surprise right). He’s from Lebanon (the country, not the city) and is currently living in Dubai. Very interesting as the Middle East isn’t a region I know anything about. He was sending off serious gaydar vibes, but I was a good boy. Exchanged cards, polite handshake (I was only growling a little).

We’ve stayed in touch via email and chat (ok so I started it). He’s come out as homo and I’ve told him about Scrappy. All good. He’s shy and as a journalist, he’s more comfortable asking questions and I’m more than happy to answer them (just step a little closer to my cage).

I feel great empathy for this guy. He’s reached this moment that I think many gay young men get to. 28 yo, he’s tired of momentary relationships and said “I’m single on purpose”. Wondering what is next and how to break thru. Like others in this range, he’s got a facade of confidence, “I’ve got big plans”, “I’ll be better looking in my middle age”, but you can’t bullshit me. He’s as fragile as a china doll and I crawl over into his personal space. He’s a bit scared, but he quickly realizes I’m not the boogie man. Plus I’m thousands of miles away, well out of clawing range.

He asks why I didn’t hit hard on him? I douse him with a few compliments but profess to being loyal to my brown growler. He talks more about his concerns in life.  Clearly he likes me and somewhere in the conversation he tells me he has great abs, a big dick and a beautiful ass. Not sure how you work that into a conversation, but he did and I’m all the happier for it. Titillating as it is.

I tell him that’s not a big interest to me and joke that from where I log my hours, big dick and great abs are a lost visual. He chuckles. I seem immune to his desire to be desired. He then sends me a beach photo, G-rated, and indeed he has a hot body all well put together (glup). I douse liberally with more compliments. He purrs a bit.

I know what you’re thinking. No. I’m a little more sensitive than that. I felt great empathy for hom. Homolife has to be deep underground in the Middle East and at that level I have to suspect it’s mostly dark and dirty. Plus his passport makes it difficult to freely travel (rights I often overlook as I roll thru countries with no regard).

He wants (or thinks he wants) a nice cozy relationship of mutual love, respect and trust. Someone to make him feel secure with his emotions and who he is or wants to be.

I’ve seen these emotions before. I struggle to understand those who can’t seem to find long term relationship. I run into these guys all the time it would seem. A few compliments, loads of empathy and patience and all homos would be married off.

1 Comment

  1. You know far more about these types of guys then I ever will, but is it really as simple as “a few compliments, loads of empathy and patience and all homos would be married off”?

    If it is that simple then you’re implying that most single homos are pretty lame. Or at least, they have little empathy, no patience and only expect to receive compliments, not give them.

    I have no idea if you’re right or wrong but your thesis is definitely interesting.

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