It’s Saturday night, I’m home alone. TC decided to go out with his former boyfriend and roommate in London’s East end. He came home last night about 3 a.m. from work, slept until 1 p.m., coughing most of the night and left this evening, in the middle doing virtually nothing. I cooked him lunch and straightened up.
He keeps asking what’s wrong. What’s wrong is he’s close to getting the axe. I can put up with the cleaning, I can put up with the immaturity, what I can’t put up with is him making me feel bad. I feel bad enough already without any added assistance. I don’t know whether it’s experience or just common sense to have a prospective on "what does the other person think/need/want". Whatever it is, he doesn’t have it. I’m too old to wait to see if he gets it.
Not helping matters, my wife has now totally switched off on me. Our communications are cold and business like. She admonishes me if I try and steer an emotional word in. No matter what I email, she seems to always interpret it opposite to what I was thinking.
I could do with some alone time. Collect my thoughts. Too often I operate at 500%, fearing that tomorrow won’t arrive. Yet I haven’t missed a tomorrow yet. Alone. Sounds scary. I’d always thought I was comfortable alone.
Unfortunately, tonight is Exilio Latino night, the weekly latin gay/lesbian club night. So I’m asking myself… what would Prof. Tim do in this situation? Got to run. 🙂