I’ve been working with my new friend, Clay, who I found out was 41, on our professional group meeting. Clay’s been out for 20 years but he bitches and complains about the gay world almost to the point of being annoying. But I’ve begun to recognize my own self in his rantings.
Bryan, my therapist, had told me the “coming out” process isn’t a one time thing. It’s a lifetime deal. You will constantly be telling people about your situation and often in shades of grey and trying to manage it. F*cking great, now just tell me I’m going to hell as well and damn I’m gonna sign up today.
Like fish swimming downstream, the current running fast, all us fishies gliding along when suddenly one crazed fish decides he wants to swim upstream. The fact you have to tell (or don’t tell) people you’re different does a real mind job on you. You can get downright cucky about things. Hence, the gay community is born, and out of the dark alley comes the flaming fags, the whore mongers, the drama queens and the leather boys.
It all seems like this is they’re way of coping with the constant cloud that hangs over their head. No doubt the gay community is keeping the entire mental medical practice alive and well. Each person deals with it in their own individual way. I’m slowly coming around to acceptance of the community as it, fruits n’ flakes, and I hope with understanding comes compassion towards all gays. They’ve each had a journey of their own.
TC UPDATE: It’s 11 a.m., a beer and a chicken sandwich, otherwise known as breakfast. TC is sitting at some beach side bar, brilliant blue water and the ship in the background. The warm breeze brushes thru his hair and his open shirt reveals his taut little body. He’s talking about something he wants me to do to him. Dirty tiger that he is. Two hours of conversation, TC hates the ship and is ready to get off, wants me to buy him a ticket back to DC. Game. Set. Match.
I am pleased to announce that Prof. Tim has won the pool of $7.28 with the correct guess of ten (10) days before TC would cave. I am surprised at how fast my tiger fell. My bet was 21 days. Mark, I realize your guess of nine days is technically correct, as TC decided yesterday, but the rules were based upon the date of announcement. I am sure we will have another pool in the future.