Well, my boys don't like me. I'm talking about my sons, my children. They're teenagers and in a rebellious mood. But they're finding it awkward to deal with me, their live-in fag.
The oldest one doesn't want me to drive him anywhere. Scared to be seen in public with me. The youngest doesn't want me to hug him, crying out "it's inappropriate". I feel a bit of distance from everyone. My wife going out to get banged by another man tonight. The only warmth I get is from TC on video. Where is that Monty Python song, "Always look on the bright side of life?".
I'm more troubled about my kids. Teenagers are a tough read, focused on themselves for the most part. The world revolves around them (gee I thought it revolved around me). But what's the right path? Is there some unsaid things? Mad at Daddy? Confused about things? Unsure themselves just how to handle all this?
Should it remain in the darkness? Or is this a family forum type of thing? I suspect we're in the don't ask, don't tell area of the game board.
Kids are used to having a mother and father. It's their base of operation. Their rock until they find their own island to operate from. An faggy ass or not, parents splitting up shatters this stone. My youngest son is livid that his mother is seeing another man. His mother needs to be his father, it's that simple.
So many unanswered questions. I want my kids to be balanced, accepting, tolerant (all the things I'm often not). Am I doing the best I can? Probably not, you can always do better. But will we make it to the other side intact. I hope so.
We all have drama in our lives, but please don't stop living while it's happening.