I’m not callous, I just know that most relationships, particularly with Americans tend to be convenience based. It’s the classic, “my friends are important to me”, unfortunately the converse rarely holds. I’m used to it, I expect nothing from others and am genuinely surprised when people step up. German actually has a specific word for people who you know but don’t classify as a full blown friend. I wander this earth with only a handful of people I would designate as a friend. Peter was and isn’t. Should have kept him on probation longer.
Nonetheless, I do have a friend, a senior executive at a large company and being as how I haven’t paid myself a nickel in the last year and not throughly enjoying the experience, I called him. He’s making his way thru the lovely Newark airport. “What’s up?“, he asks. I need a job, I need one now, I will do anything legal and illegal is looking like a distinct possibility. “What about your start-up?” It’s a lawn mower with a bad spark plug. He laughs. “OK, you wanna do this …“, he explains some position managing a department where one of the existing members is looking to be promoted. “You can do the job in your sleep”, he winks. Works for me. “OK I’m running around the world next 2 weeks, but let me set up for you to meet some folks“. Elapsed time 5 minutes.
At 8.30 this morning, phone rings and someone from the company is calling to schedule a round of interviews. It’s all perfunctory, as long as I don’t run nude thru the office lobby, odds are good, he will slot me in.
It’s one of the things I like about the brown culture, they seem to circle the wagons when one of their tribal members is in distress, working together to right the ship. Us white folk don’t operate that way. It’s all for one and all for me. The best you can hope for is a touch of sympathy, but the reality, they really don’t give a shit. We’re all just maggots in a manure pile. Anyone wanna challenge me on that one?
We often spend far too much time worrying about what others will think, when in fact their opinion matters scant little in the grand scheme of things. Make yourself happy, make a handful of true friends in your lifetime, feel the pain when your friends have it, try and help, don’t hurt and mostly don’t worry about the rest.