Re-reading some of my posts (I continue to amuse myself). I hope you’re not thinking I’m gay bashing. Quite the opposite. No person in their right mind wakes up and say, “Hey – I’m going queer today. Shock myself, my family, my friends. Live a life where I’m may find myself discriminated against (best case) or placed in the path of physical harm (Idaho on a bad day). I’ll struggle with the complexities of developing a relationship with another guy, who in fact has struggled with their own identity. Never sure whether I can show public affection to another without repercussion. An I realize that no matter what I do, I’m gonna be different for the rest of my life.” I have to imagine there’s absolutely “no waiting” in that line to be served.
Me? I can go stand on top my building and scream out “I like to do women doggie style” and men and women alike will stop and yell back, “go for it big boy”. So for anybody to swim against the current of accepted behavior, takes guts and a strong will. Every gay guy has faced this challenge and irrespective of how well they handled themselves, it’s left an indelible mark on them. So it’s no big surprise if you run into one who’s carrying some emotional baggage.
You? Married, wife, kiddies, living life on the down low? Well, you’re cheating the system. Trying to get the best of both worlds. It’s no wonder a fully “out” gay guy might take offense, he crossed the line, you haven’t. But everyone has their special story and everyone can appreciate that we all handle this in our own way. There is no roadmap to follow.
So with all this, I’ve developed a fair amount of respect for gay guys. I’ve been amused, saddened and angered in various relationships over the last year, but never disinterested. If one of my postings was disrespectful, please accept my apologies, that wasn’t my intent.