ICE train 503 is bolting down the tracks at ~ 300 km/h or roughly 185 miles per hour, heading out of Bernn, Switzerland. We're on our way back home. TC is busying himself seated next to me trying to play a porno on my laptop and asking loudly what "Young Latino Barebackers 3" is about. I slam the screen closed, we're gonna get thrown off the train.
Eventually, we settle in and watch an episode of Queer as Folk. Drew Boyd, the straight acting football player character has fallen for Emmett Honeycutt (the queenie character) and deals with his entire coming out situation. I'm struck by a conversation where Drew, sitting in a car, is trying to explain to Emmett how his attraction for men is just a phase. Emmett asks Drew some hard questions about himself, that makes me a little nervous. The irony isn't lost on TC who is nudging me with his elbow and giving me a look.
In later episodes the relationship finally ends on a bittersweet note when Emmett spots Drew flirting with another man. Rather than being angry or jealous, Emmett recognizes that Drew, being so newly out, needs time to explore his new-found gay world.
Have I taken enough time to explore this new world? You be the judge. I was slutty for a only a brief period and it was more PG-13 than anything else. Do I want to screw around more? Kind of pointless, it's not like I'm wanting for sex. I'm not a big "date" person, "I'll see you next Tuesday" sort of thing, I know what I like and I just go for it.
The problem is life is about choices. If you go right, it means you didn't go left and whatever was "left" you're not gonna see. So rather than worry about what you're missing, perhaps you should stare out the window and take in the "right" side of life. I keep trying to take my own advice.
BTW "Young Latinos Barebackers 2" was much better than "3". 🙂