My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story


TC is annoyed. He’s annoyed he has to work. Annoyed that we’re running late. Annoyed we have to take the subway. We’re having dinner with a big group of his friends. He’s now annoyed with me for sniffing around on him (I like to sniff around on him).

We leave the dinner and go to some hip-hop club. Me in a hip-hop club. It’s 12.45 at night and TC has to work tomorrow. I venture that perhaps it best since (a) I would be the oldest person in history to set foot in this club and that (b) he has to get up in 6 hours to work that we call it a night. Now he’ really annoyed.

Enroute home, he’s lecturing me about how I need to behave myself, “no sniffing around on me”, act your age, we’re an embarrassment together. Like pulling a thread, he just keeps pulling. He can’t introduce me to any of his friends, it’s awkward, what are we going to do living apart, what kind of relationship is this. I’m looking out the window, that falefel place is open late night, that’s great to know.

At home, the surly cat, hurries into bed where I find him with the sheet over his head. He’s either pretending to be a ghost or it’s a sign to stay away. I climb in, turn out the light still thinking about that falefel place.

From out of the darkness, the cat leaps into my arms, nuzzling his head on my shoulder he whispers, “I hate you” and promptly falls soundly asleep.

Who really understands the magical composition of a good relationship? It’s a low level signal that we often allow to be drowned out by the many variables in our lives. Like a shortwave radio signal, it carries far and wide and can be heard with simple equipment. Yet, we’re often not listening for it. Life is not that complicated, but we endeavor to make it that way.

There is clearly some low level signal that is carrying our mutual relationship, one that many relationships are often missing and we both recognize it best in the still of night when we’re listening for it.


  1. Chris, Chris, Chris

    Is this affair starting to unravel?

  2. In my opinion, you need a cup of coffee…wake up!

  3. What does “sniffing around on him” mean? I’ve never heard this expression. Do you literrally stand there, with your snorter close to his armpits or other smelly parts, and sniff him? In public? Why? There must be some other meaning for “sniffing around on him,” but i’s a hidden code. Perhaps it’s a Canadianism? Please explain what it means, as it appears to be pivotal to your blog entry, but is neither explained nor illustrated. Thank you. (P.S.: I love your posts.)

  4. “Wondering”…….sniffing around on him mean that Chris is “eyeing” rather publically all the “talent” in the room, right in front of TC…..and TC doesn’t much like that…..which makes Chris “smile inside” I think.

  5. Chris: TC does not literally hate you; he “hates” you because you are right to insist he become responsible. He knows you are right about getting home early enough for work the next day. However awkward you feel being with him, he should show you more respect by making you feel comfortable with his friends. You should “chat” with him about that. But at the same time, you should not disrespect him by sniffing around so prominently and embarrassing him. There seems more to the story than you have told so far.

  6. This is why I wanna be’s too complicated..up and down..drama!

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