After being locked in the apartment, I decided I needed to get out of the house last night. This entailed taking my first shower in 2 days. I ping’d the guy in my building I had met at the meet-up group, Bryon and after a handful of texts he agreed to meet in our lobby and go out in the neighborhood for a quick dinner. Freshly washed, we head out into the cold winter air to a nearby Italian. A super nice guy, well-traveled, probably early 40’s, youthful looking, good job, pleasant enough conversation. He’d make the perfect Christmas gift.
I’m telling Bryon all about the brown tiger when on cue, Tiger Puff calls. Hearing some background noise, Tiger Puff immediately asks where are you? And I tell him. You can feel the static electricity on the line. “Fine, have a nice evening, do whatever you want” and he hangs up. The dreaded “do whatever you want“. Damn. Don’t you just love Tiger Puff? So now a day later, he still won’t take my calls. The jealousy in him is such a strong emotion it suppresses any attempt to rationalize with him. He’ll get over it. For now, he’s up in his tree hissing. I’m a rock star after all.
But just how do you go about meeting people of your species? I keep hearing about people meeting ‘on-line’ and it sounds like a meat market just slightly above Craigslist. What’s the protocol and etiquette? Most importantly, what’s the point? A quick scan of gay.com reveals a number of guys to be on line on this cold afternoon. The onliners are broken down into guys with headless naked torso shots with short to no profile information, guys with face pics and scant profiles and a handful of folks who appear to have mastered the English language.
What I particularly enjoy are those who simply have “ask me” in their profiles. Ask you about what? Ask you about how stupid you are? How uninteresting? There’s a 52 year old white guy, in a distant photo walking a horse. Someone you might see at your country club. His headline “MWM who loves to breed man cunt”. Yes indeed. Another ex-military, has a nice photo, pithy tongue in check profile. Sounds good. I look at those guys he thinks are hot? All are into S&M, “I am looking for someone to be my slave”. Really now.
Bryon and I were talking about all of this, unfortunately as he’s found now in years, it can be a dark seedy underground. It strikes me as quite a bit of immaturity combined with some pent up psycho issues. Not everyone is wacked out and Bryon was living proof there are nice guys.
PS: The brown Tiger came down from his tree (again) swatted me a couple of times for bad behaviour and is trotting about as normal.