My Trip Out

Gay married man coming out story

A maze of issues

Image307 TC called yesterday with a brief “How are you, I’m fine”. A few hours later though he called again, this time he unleashed a sea of emotions on me with enough topics to have me writing into next week.

Strong on his mind is his family’s acceptance of his gayness. TC has a huge circle of family and they’re all quite tight, such is the brown culture. Unfortunately, there’s little acceptance of his sexual status, at best he gets tolerance. His mother hopes it will just go away. His father publicly announces TC’s best girl friend is his “girlfriend” when that couldn’t be further from the truth and he well knows it. Other family members either don’t ask about his guy relationships or pretend he’s looking for a woman.

His parents are certainly tolerance, more so than you’d find in the US, his boyfriends have had sleep overs at his house with his parents fully aware. But its’ the tolerance rather than the acceptance that’s on TC’s mind. Whenever a situation arises about his orientation, arguments quickly ensue and then each party sulks back to their corner. No resolution is ever reached.

TC wants to send his parents a long email after he gets to Germany, an edict, if you will. He’s going to start telling them about me and more so about himself and how he is and hope their tolerance will segway to acceptance of his sexual orientation.

I have much angst for Chris. In the midst of trying to be a young adult, he’s got to fight this battle. It’s tough going for him now many years into the process. It make me wonder how my adventure will turn out.


  1. Oh that poor little cub or yours! He is so sensitive and intelligent; I can see why you two are so closely bonded. His parents sound like A-holes (forgive the profanity). Hopefully they will be more understanding once they learn about you, and how close you and the cub are. If he were my son, well, I might have a problem — but he’s only 11 for God sakes! But, put yourself in their shoes, and thingk what yhou would like to hear if TC were your son and a lovely older guy was wanting to be his friend. As I say, all you have to do is demonstrate to them how right and wonderful thi is; they will come around. All the best.

  2. Sorry – I usually don’t reply to comments (thanks for them though). But Don’s calls for a correction. Chris’s parents are good people and love & support their son. Only culturally they struggle to deal with all of this, a dilemma I think many parents may well fact.

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